As your child grows from a baby to a toddler to a preschool aged child, she changes a great deal in her mobility, her language, her social skills.

Motor skills
1 year to 15 months: she starts to walk; 15-18 months, she runs, climbs up the stairs; 2 years of age, she can walk up the stairs; at 3 years old, you can teach her to ride a tricycle; at 4 years of age, you can teach her throw a ball, use scissors to cut out pictures. When she is 5 years old, she maybe able to draw triangles from copy.

What you can do:

As she gains more mobility, safety is very important.

• You need to keep her in a correctly installed car seat.
• Teach her pedestrian skills so that she does not run out onto the street into oncoming traffic.
• Make sure there are childproof caps on medicines and any household poisons and keep them out of your child’s reach; and have a supply of Syrup of Ipecac in case of accidental ingestion.

Language skills

• One year old: she says ‘mama’ and ‘dada’ and can respond to simple statements, such as ‘no’ ‘bye-bye’ and ‘give me.’
• 18 months old: she can say on an average about 10 words, and name pictures.
• 2 years old, she can start to put three words together and you will find yourself having a conversation with your toddler.
• 3 years old, she can tell people her name and know her sex, can count up to 3.
• 4 years old, she starts to tell you imaginary, ‘make-believe’ stories. It would be best for you to play along with these ‘make-believe’ stories and not discourage her from telling them, no matter how outrageous they may seem, because they are a normal and essential part of your child’s development.
• 5 years old, she can count up to 10, repeat longer sentences, and name up to 4 colors.

What you can do:

• Surround your child with language. Talk, read, sing and tell stories together.
• Give simple explanations for the way things work.
• Ask questions that are more than “yes” or “no” answers. This encourages your child to talk.

Social skills

• At 15 months, she starts to hug her parents.
• 2 years old, she can listen to picture stories.
• 3 years old, she starts to want to play with other children.
• 4 years old, she can play with several children.
• 5 years old, she can dress and undress herself, asks questions about meaning of words.

What you can do:

• Spend time with your child, play and be active together. Playing is how a young child learns.
• When she is 3 years old, start organizing social activities or take her to the park to play with other children.
• Encourage your child to work through problems before you offer help and allow her to make discoveries.
• Limit TV. Children under age two should not watch TV.
• Make sure your child eats healthy foods and gets plenty of sleep and exercise.

Emotional development

Her emotional development may be harder on you, the parent. Once she starts to walk, she can become irritable easily. She wants to ‘test’ her new ability and power to control her independence: she may not want you to hold her hand, and yet cries when you walk away. Beginning at 18 months to 2 years of age, she may start to show signs of ‘terrible two,’ when she says ‘no’ to everything you say and can start to throw temper tantrums.

What you can do:

• Be patient
• Be consistent with your discipline, realizing that this is normal development for most children
• Set an example of how you want your child to act
• Set clear limits that fit your child’s age and abilities
• Give a limited number of acceptable choices. This helps your child learn to make decisions, making it easier for her to do what you want. For example, ask, “Do you want to wear your blue or red shirt?”
• Understand your child’s individual temperament and personality.

Every child has her own personality and emotional temperament and needs to be treated as an individual. You can visit www.preventiveoz.org for more information about children’s temperaments so that you can better understand your child’s behavior and how best to parent her.

Differences in development

• It is important that you do not compare your child to other children. All children develop differently – some talk sooner, some walk sooner and talk later.
• If you think there might be a problem or have questions about your child’s development, talk to your doctor or call California Early Start at 408-374-9960.
• If your child does not say any words at 18 months or phrases at 30 months, ask your doctor to have your child evaluated.

Toilet training

There is no right age to toilet train a child. Readiness to begin toilet training depends on the individual child. In general, starting before age 2 (24 months) is not recommended. The readiness skills and physical development your child needs occur between age 18 months and 2.5 years.

Some signs that your child is ready for toilet training include:

• She imitates your behavior.
• She begins to put things where they belong.
• She expresses an interest in toilet training (eg, follows you to the bathroom).
• She can walk and is ready to sit down.
• She can let you know when she is ‘going’—e.g. says she is making ‘pee-pee’ and then when she needs to "go."
• She is able to pull clothes up and down (on and off).

What you can do:

• Spend time with your child, play and be active together, listen to your child and respond promptly.
• Be supportive of your child’s make-believe games and doll-play. These are great ways for your child to learn social skills. Learn more about your child’s development so you know what to expect.Visit www.kidshealth.org and www.zerotothree.org.
• Set an example of how you want your child to act; set clear limits that fit your child’s age and abilities.
• Limit rules to important issues and remember it is normal for your child to say “no” often.
• Give a limited number of acceptable choices. This helps your child learn to make decisions, making it easier for him/her to do what you want. For example, ask, “Do you want to wear your blue or red shirt?”
• Begin toilet training when your child is ready, usually at about one year of age.
• Provide opportunities for your child to play with other children.
• Surround your child with language. Talk, read, sing and tell stories together.
• Give simple explanations for the way things work.
• Ask questions that are more than “yes” or “no” answers. This encourages your child to talk.
• Encourage your child to work through problems before you offer help and allow him/ her to make discoveries.
• Limit TV. Children under age two should not watch TV at all.
• Make sure your child eats healthy foods and gets plenty of sleep and exercise.

Information reviewed by expert sources: Dr. May Loo, Santa Clara County Public Health